and now i'm a wife

I've started off the new year all revved up for change & new projects (not a bad thing) but perhaps without spending the necessary time on quiet reflection that is so vital. And that's not like me. I'm all about favorites, best of's, to do lists, dream lists, what I learned from my summer vacation style personal essays & the like. But I, like most people, have a lot going on in this little head of mine right now concerning the areas of home & work so maybe it would behoove me to step back & take a moment . Or two. Or twenty.

As previously mentioned, in the mad dash leading up to the Crimble holiday, I had so many things I wanted to rant about online. A lot of which was inspired by my good pal Kristy, who seems to ask the most interesting questions about life & love on her cutely named blog, I'm Gonna Marry You Someday.

And today I read a post of hers that once again really struck a chord with me. I too can remember the butterflies of anticipation in the days & months before my hubbie finally popped the question. I didn't have as many "this is it" moments, per se. The proposal was definitely not out of the blue, but for how long we'd been talking about getting married before that, with more of a when rather than if, I can't really say. Isn't that funny? It was probably only two years ago, but I can't recall when exactly our first hesitant uses of the words "when we get married," said initially with a hint of humor as a means to test the water with each other, gave way to a real & definite plan. Somewhere along the way, the conversation about if & someday, become when & where.  How delightful.

He did end up surprising me though. It wasn't a moonlit walk on the beach or a dinner under a spraying fountain. (Kristy, do I get all my romantic inspiration from you & Mike??) On a relaxed Sunday afternoon at his family's local pub, we visited with his aunts & uncles & grandma, enjoying a few pints of the black stuff - not exactly your prime spot for a proposal.

This isn't a photo from the proposal day but it was taken by lovely Aurora a while back when she was in town with her Sandy. A romantic spot, no?

A little bit of local color

Anyway, he whipped out the ring that he just happened to have in his pocket (no seriously, it was in his pocket to bring it home for a more elaborate & conventionally romantic proposal the following day) & it turned out to be a perfectly imperfect strangely romantic but more importantly happy moment in the presence of family - including one rather delighted granny.

And now I'm a wife.

If I were to pinpoint something I miss, for me it's not so much the anticipation of the proposal, which I kinda knew wouldn't include fireworks or a mariachi band (imagine that?) but more the period of simply being engaged. That anticipation of the Big Day approaching, the waiting stretched out over a year & a half, the budding obsession with wedding websites (which still hasn't totally abated), the endless thoughts about flowers & decoration ideas, menus & dresses, iTunes playlists with a Mexican wedding vibe - I found all of it (even the online budgeting tools, the spreadsheets & the more boring logistics) to be thrillingly fun! I'd go to sleep every night a little obsessed, unable to sleep for the visions of centerpieces & cupcakes dancing in my head. And I know that at times I tipped dangerously into the obsessed-and-losing-sight-of-what's-really-important zone, but for the most part I enjoyed the meticulous planning, the hours of scouring ebay for finds, the fun process of designing my dress.

So yeah, I miss that. (But lucky for me I have two- COUNT 'EM TWO -  best buds planning their own weddings right now. So the fun continues vicariously!)

But I have to say, so far, being a wife is pretty great. Sure, we have yet to add a mortgage, baby or any major couple challenges into the mix yet, but that'll come when it's time. For now, the husband & I are laying low, putting together the first twigs of a nest egg, trying out elaborate recipes & watching movies. And that's pretty great, too.

***Honeymoon feet in Mexico***